Valiant Sisterhood: Confessions and Stories (Jumbled Thoughts)

I took one look at this photo and decided I looked like a tired zombie who tried to cover it up with makeup. And my hair...bless it's tired, tangled, top-knot heart.  

Oh well...I made a valiant effort. lol

Ever had one of those weeks where you have an entire week's schedule you made up for yourself...and now its facing you and pointing you in a thousand directions you need to go during the next hour. (?) #realstruggles :) 

The interesting facet(s) of my life is that not only am I an adult living at home and working from home, but I am also a full time sister to 8 siblings and third in the 9 kid birth order. (For those that are confused about my sibling head count, we have a foster placement right now and I generally count them in the family census. :D ). 

I read an Instagram post recently that had two pictures in the post. One was a messy living room, and the other was a perfectly set up, Instagram worthy Bible study photo; complete with a Bible, beautiful journal, and a cup of steaming coffee. The caption started with this... "For those of you wondering, this photo is definitely not a picture of my quiet time today." I laughed out loud, literally**, because it wasn't mine either and it isn't for five days out of every week. 

Those of us who can have this Bible study... it's great. I love Saturdays when I have that wonderful pleasure of being alone with Jesus and Coffee (Because let's face it, sometimes those two things together minister to body and soul at once.). 

But #homeschooling happens. ;)

On a more serious note, sometimes I have to medicate the empty brain; you know that state of mind that you have after a long day. :)  It's crucial for me to do that at the end of the day so that I don't start the next one worse off than the one before. It's funny what you start doing for yourself when you know other little humans are depending on you to be your best self for them. They need a smile. 

I heard a message in church recently that gave me an idea. Bible Study/Quiet Time/Prayer Time (personally a favorite term because it determines a closeness to God) is the most selfless thing you can do.


Because we spend our waking hours with other people, it becomes so necessary, especially for me, to find refuge in solitude with Jesus. Whether this is at night or in the morning, it is my saving grace!! I stay up late sometimes because that is when I am most alone, the house is quiet, and I can have that one on one listening time with God. If the house isn't quiet, and I need the breather, I go outside and walk around our small farm at night. The astronomy of the Georgia sky is uncommonly breathtaking.

It is in these moments when I am alone that I am faced with only a limited perspective of the criteria of God's holiness. It's not a criteria that we can ever meet, but it is nevertheless quite an innumerable list of his attributes that I will NEVER ever measure up to. Not even in heaven will I remotely compare.

So why then, if God is so holy and we are not, do we spend our time basking in that holiness when "it's not like we can own that"?

Because there is no more peaceful place to be than completely absorbed in God's holiness and His presence!

In the words of R.C. Sproul in his pamphlet entitled "God Is Holy":

"Not only does God penetrate every aspect of our lives, but He penetrates it in His majestic holiness. Therefore, we must seek to understand what the holy is. There can be no worship, no spiritual growth, no true obedience without it. It defines our goal as Christians. God has declared, "Be holy, for I am holy" (Lev. 11:44). To reach that goal, we must understand what holiness is."

That is why we approach God in times of quiet and get alone with Him! Admittedly, it is difficult to focus on all of the attributes of God's holiness when we are completely absorbed in the moments of our day. That is why designated ALONE time with God is something I am convicted to be essential to my faith. 

Here's a story. 

So I was in deep thought about some things a couple of weeks ago, and even though I was facing a full day of teaching the next day, I walked outside at 11:00 pm and shut the door. I spent 30 minutes singing. After I had done that, I went to bed feeling so much more ready for bed than I had on other nights previous. I ditched screen time that typically swallows us all up in the evening hours. But 2020 is a year for me to focus on others and ditch a lot of selfish hours. 

Is that a cheezy way to worship? Yes? Okay, fine, that's fair. But try it sometime. Enjoying God's creation and creating music in even a private worship setting is a good way I use to spend time with Jesus. Not the only way, to be sure, but one of a few ways I find beautiful. 

Private worship of all kinds (prayer, reading, note taking, singing, observing, etc.) is what I need in order to be the best example I can be to my younger siblings. Again, **truth alert**, I fail so often!! Just ask them all!

One of my siblings (okay, another story) is quite the little "worship leader". He's almost 7 but his personality could win over the worst of terrorists; I'm convinced (I almost thought about taking him to Washington with me to win over the House Majority Leader.). :) Anyway...whenever this kid hears a worship song, his switch flips on and he is all there in the moment. He knows the words to many old hymns and a few new songs and it is just precious to watch him sing his heart out. 

People could look at this and think...that's just kid behavior. But I tell you, a more sold out heart for Jesus I've never seen. I was going through something tough and he told me he was praying for me. He loves to sing, fights to pray first at bedtime, shares Jesus with his Science class friends, and is a passionate little kid. 

Despite our age difference, we learn from each other. I want to model good for little eyes like his. One thing I try to emphasize with any of my younger siblings is prayer. Prayer before meals, prayer before bed (when my parents are either out of town or out of the house), asking them for prayer. I have been BLOWN away by how children are so willing to pray for you. At one point or another, all of my younger siblings have come up to me and told me that they prayed for me or someone else who had been having a difficult time. It is a beautiful thing to love to pray at such an early age. 

Let me turn to the word of God for a moment though, because that is where God puts His children's hearts to rest.

For context, I am going to include a lot of verses and I will underline the ones that jump out at me.

"Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as they hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you. 

(There's more. So much more!)

"And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you."

Matthew 6:1-6-

     God doesn't discourage corporate prayer; because if that was the case, we wouldn't pray in church and there would be no altar calls. But there is something about that deeply personal time with Christ that needs to be a part of our every day lives. As a sister, I don't have my personal prayer times in front of my younger siblings (because that would probably be difficult *smile*). Does it mean I don't encourage them to pray whenever I can??? Of course not! I want them to know I pray and in turn help them to see that something much deeper and more precious is available to God's children when we do that. I also want them to understand that God will reward them for their persistence in private prayer because "your Father who sees in secret will reward you".

     I wish I could add thoughts to these scriptures, but I can merely echo their context in saying that the rewards from praying in secret and not before other men are innumerable. I can't tell you any specific instance where I feel God blessed me or someone in my family for their "valiant" lifestyle of prayer, fasting, and private worship. God blesses me with the very air I breathe, so I cannot say that manna has ever fallen from heaven because I worshiped faithfully in secret. :) God blesses me in ways I don't deserve. Such as providing me with a family to live with and serve with in ministry, the experiences God gives me in which to grow me, the siblings that watch my every move (as nervous as that makes me), and the love that I am surrounded with. God is good to me and I want that to be seen when my siblings talk to me, interact with me, and witness my actions throughout the day.

Why was this post titled "Valiant Sisterhood" if so much of it is focused on private worship? Because to me, being more valiant as a sister requires me to be that much closer to Christ. I cannot be a light to them or any other person if my heart is not firmly founded in a relationship with my Savior. If we can take one step in that wonderful direction each day, sisters and brothers, we will be valiant siblings for our immediate families and the family we have by being adopted in Christ.

Thanks for reading, brothers and sisters!

Maddy-